the home stretch

The end is near! 53 days/7-ish weeks until JumboBaby's eviction date, and I'm seeing signs all around that he really and truly will be here sooner than later. A sampling:

1) Craft stores have FALL things out. No, I don't (often) shop in craft stores. With the exception of that bitchin' wreath I concocted last year (see September 24, 2007) I leave the crafting to the trained professionals at Pottery Barn. But anyway...they have fall stuff out! I parked outside a craft store today en route to another shop, and through the window I spied grinning scarecrows, bundles of hay, and wreaths of burnt orange leaves. That can only mean it's almost FALL- when babies come! Along the same lines, WallyWorld is clearancing the swimming pools and lawn chairs, and filling in those vacancies with displays of notebooks and crayons- BACK TO SCHOOL- when babies come!

2) We have a STROLLER in our house! Okay, so we've actually got a ripped apart box with 15 stroller pieces strewn around the dining room...details, details. I thought I might assemble the stroller, which arrived today, but upon further inspection decided it's a man job. But the pieces sure are cute!

3) I've outgrown some of my maternity clothes. Yikes. The belly is simply too big to fit under some of the more stylish "2nd trimesterish" pieces of my limited maternity wardrobe. Even the stuff that still fits is fitting me...well, pregnantly. I'm pulling my tops down, my bottoms up, and the whole effect is a very Farley-ish "fat guy in a little coat". I'm suddenly seeing the appeal of muumuus (moo-moos seems more appropriate, no?) I mean, maybe with leggings....? Not so much? Okay. I also spent a few moments the other day wondering why all my underpants had shrunk, and asked J if his underpants shrunk, too. Unfortunately, no underpant shrinkage occured. My butt is pregnant, too.

4) I'm pretty sure that at this point, an air mattress on the bathroom floor might not be such a bad idea. I spend the witching hours in an unconscious march from bed to bathroom, bathroom to bed, bed to bathroom. I don't feel so bad about occasionally missing my daily walk (on account of the 300 degree heat) because I get my workout in doing the potty walk. The kitties no longer sleep with us, so inconvenient were my frequent stirrings.

5) Increasingly frequent moments of panic in the middle of the night, much like my horrific nightmares in the spring of 2004 where I showed up to our wedding in sweatpants or forgot to order bridesmaid dresses or was left abandoned at the alter....the baby panic dreams have started. No, I'm not sleep stressing over the biggies- labor, delivery, the very possible risk of a major operation to extract JumboBaby- it's the trite details that disrupt my sleep. Sometimes I jolt awake in bed after a nightmare where we simply forgot to buy diapers. Once I dreamt that we got home with the baby to discover the nursery had fallen off the house, chunks of the room were scattered around our front lawn. The most disturbing was when J went to pull the car around upon our hospital discharge...then peeled out of the parking lot, never to be seen again. I sat calmly in my wheelchair, watching him go. JumboBaby and I bussed it home.

I could go on and on, but I'm fatigued. Another wonderful mid-third-trimester symptom...the return of 1st trimester fatigue. I'm actually turning into an infant, it seems. Eat, sleep, pee, cry, repeat.